Monday, September 26, 2011



Academia: An Open Letter to the Parents of the Badly Behaved Children in The Lion King:

Dear Parents,

Hi there. Remember me? I was sitting about six rows behind you in The Lion King on Friday night. If you don't remember me, I understand. You were so focused on the movie that the presence of other people didn't really seem to register with you. And by "other people," I don't just mean all of us who paid the outrageous movie ticket prices in the hopes of enjoying a beloved movie from our childhood. I also mean your children.

Look, I don't expect silence and perfect stillness when I go to a kids' movie. I know that it's hard for little kids to sit still for a long time, and that they will talk and squirm through a movie. If I go to a kids' movie, I accept that this will happen when I buy my ticket. What I don't accept is children whose parents let them treat the movie theater like a playground. Shrieking, running up and down the stairs, and talking nonstop at the top of your lungs are not appropriate things to do in a movie theater. The other kids in the theater didn't do any of these things. What in the world was going on with your family?

I don't blame your kids. They're little and they can't help it. But you did absolutely nothing to encourage them to behave, nor did you take them out when you realized that this just wasn't going to work out this time. I know that you paid a lot of money to see this movie. But you know what? So did I. And I cared about seeing The Lion King a lot more than your kids did. For me, this was a chance to relive a favorite memory from childhood, and I looked forward to it for weeks. For them, it was a chance to do exactly the same things they probably do most of the time, except in the dark and with stairs. Your steadfast ignoring of their behavior spoiled the whole experience for me.

In the future, please better prepare your kids for whatever situation you're bringing them into. They can't be expected to just know how to behave; you have to teach them. And if they're not getting it, you have to be willing to leave. It sucks, but you're their parents. It's your job to teach them to respect others and act like human beings. For the sake of the rest of our collective sanity, please do your job.


Sartorial: This is what I wore for all of that. At least I was comfortable. P.S. I learned how to French braid!

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